I.....AM.......ANGRY.....

I'm going to be honest with you all tonight. REAL honest. I'm a bit worked up - and it's due to a Chinese person. And I don't say that in a RACIST way...I'm a fan of Asia and spent 2 great years there teaching English. But I'm going to tell you a story that will, I think, make you all JUST as angry at that Chinese person as I am.
But first - today...2 more shows. Nothing too much to report. Both went off without a hitch. The venue added Q&A after each show with the audience - but the kids were pretty low key with their questions. No silly situation like before, where question after question after question was about making puppets.
Tonight's slate of entertainment was to go to see the new revival of The Pajama Game on Broadway. It stars Harry Connick Jr. and Kelly O'Hara, and Elisa, Eric and I got tickets through our membership to the Hip Tix program with Roundabout Theater. $36. Ain't NOTHING wrong with that. PLUS - we got to go to a party afterwards in the penthouse of the theater - and it was fun- and some of the cast was there and we got gift bags. Good times, right?

So....here is the theater.

And this plaque-like-thing is on the wall outside the theater. I liked it. I kind of feel like we cast spells when we do our show.

WELL - my problems started before the show started, as I was sitting in my seat, minding my own business, and noticing the 3 seats to my RIGHT all empty - and the show getting ready to start. No SOONER do I think to myself, 'Aaaah nice. A seat beside me open...' then I look up and LUMBERING down the row is this jolly Chinese man, with a STRANGE hat on and 3 HUGE shopping bags. But I'm thinking, in denial, 'Ohhhh...he won't sit RIGHT next to me with 3 seats open.' WRONG THOUGHT, ANDERSON! He sits RIGHT next to me...and starts to unlayer...hitting me 3 times with his stupid scarf. And there was something OFF about his demeanor, as well. He was GIDDY with excitement about the show, I think. Fine. Whatever.
So - the overture starts...and mid-overture, I see out of the corner of my eye the Jolly Chinese Man put his scarf up to his mouth...and then I hear him BELCH! LOUD! And then he puts his scarf down and continues BEAMING with joy over seeing the show. So fine - he bleched and I will now refer to him as BELCHY. So the action starts, and BELCHY is sitting WAY forward in his seat, and EVERYTIME someone comes on stage, he starts clapping for them. Not just Harry Connick Jr. or Kelly O'Hara. But like...all the supporting people....which I guess was nice, but it got a LITTLE annoying. So we get into the action, and BELCHY is beside me practically dancing in his seat....and LOUD LAUGHING at everything in the show. And then I start to panic, because I start to wonder if the people around us, who kept looking at him out of the corner of their eyes, thought I was with him! I was MORTIFIED. Anyway - so we get into the 2nd number...everything is going well except...you know...for the previously mentioned antics that Belchy is engaging in, and all of the sudden, I see the scarf go up to his mouth again. And it's 5-6-7-8....BELCH! And the woman in front of him kind of glances back over her shoulder at him. YEAH - it was THAT loud. In that moment, I tried to transport myself to ANYWHERE but Mezzanine Row E Seat 126. No luck. SO - I continue to watch the show with BLECHY dancing, laughing, clapping and BELCHING through the rest of the first act. End of ACT I: 8 belches. EIGHT! That is ONE burp every 8 1/2 minutes of the first act! UN-believable!
INTERMISSION: Belchy stands up and asks to get out of the aisle...so we all move and he goes out. I spend intermission talking to the delightful couple next to me about the show. They were a cute little couple in their late 70's/early 80's in from Brooklyn to see the show. He is legally blind - and watched the show through a telescope-type thing...and he said, 'I can't see much...but what I can see and hear, I LOVE!' So I almost forget about BELCHY...because of this great couple...but not completely, because I look up and he is lumbering back DOWN the row - and he has brought his FRIEND with him this time to sit next to him in the spare seat. Great.
So as Belchy is heading back down the row and stepping over everyone, he keeps slipping, and falling into people and just making an awkward progression down the row. He gets to the woman beside me, he steps over her and ends up stepping on her purse. AND THEN...AND THEN...he turns to slide past me, falls back a bit and steps on my coat that is nicely folded under my seat. I don't think anything of it...except that I'm bothered...and we go on with the 2nd Act.
2nd Act: same as first BUT...there is a new element. Belchy's friend evidently doesn't speak much English, so Belchy spends the 2nd act doing everything he did in the first act AND ALSO explaining everything to his Chinese Friend in Chinese as the act goes along. All the while, belching...and BELCHING...AND BELCHING. Act 2 total: 7 belches. (That is one every 9 minutes for the 2nd act.)
Show ends, and it was a REALLY great production...earned an 8 on the MASE and it was fun and light and perfect...but the end is the end and I had to get OUT of there. I meet up with Elisa and Eric, and we head up to the 5th floor penthouse for the Hip Tix Party! We get in, push past and through everyone, and get our gift bags and treats and whatnot, and we're standing around and I notice 2 things: 1) BELCHY and FRIEND are flitting around the party, scooping up all the free stuff they can; and 2) members of the cast start to arrive. And closest to me is Michael McKean - and I think PERFECT BLOG STUFF! I'll get my picture with Michael McKean and put it on the blog. SOOOOO - (ominous music begins) - I pull out my camera, turn it on and notice the LCD Screen is ALL WHITE with a couple of black blotches and a blue, green, yellow and pink line down the right side. We all look at it, I turn it off, turn it back on and find that it's the SAME thing. And I start to put the pieces of the puzzle together: I used the camera before the show to take a picture of the theater...I slide the camera in the pocket of my coat...I fold my coat up and slide it under my chair...and then the BELCHING CHINESE OGRE STEPPED ON MY COAT!! AND IT MAKES ME REALLY MAD AT HIM!!!

Here it is. The CAMERA with it's "NEW PROBLEMS". AND a close-up, as well.

So there. I took some pics with the camera - and came home and loaded them onto my computer and they are fine...but I just can't get anything in the LCD window. Now - the camera does have a warranty/coverage plan with Best Buy that my work friends bought for me when I got the camera, but I'm PRETTY sure the plan doesn't cover burping Asians. I am going to take it to a Best Buy in the city tomorrow after our shows and see what happens. Bottom line is that I'm pretty sure I'll have to pay for the repairs to the LCD screen. So now I'm mad AND poor. And I can't very well just send a bill to China, you know? They are going to need more details than just JOLLY BELCHING CHINESE MAN.

This is the picture Elisa took with the camera after we discovered the cracked LCD. It WORKS!

L: Eric and Elisa show off our GIFT BAGS. R: The LOOT in the bag. (The bags the Press got were SO much cooler...)

Anyway - that's the story of the day...I'll let you know how it works out tomorrow.
Thanks for listening...I'm going to bed to sleep this off.
Cheers.
G



The ONE HIGHLIGHT of the evening was THIS: Here I am with one of my MOST favorite Broadway performers EVER! Her name is Jennifer Cody - and to my enjoyment and surprise...she was in The Pajama Game! I have seen her in: Seussical, Taboo, Urinetown and now, The Pajama Game. She is SO great on stage - and she was SO nice to talk to me tonight! She was also VERY sorry about my experience with BELCHY. AND she invited me to come see her and her husband (HUNTER FOSTER) in Hello Dolly at Papermill Playhouse. So, basically, we're new best friends.
THANKS JENNIFER!